***My eldest son, Yosef, left for Army Basic Training in October. This series documents my parenting experience through his nearly three months away from home. Please note: this series is not affiliated with the U.S. Army National Guard in any way, all observations and opinions are my own. ***
During our weekly call on Sunday, Yosef was finally allowing himself to think about being done with Basic Training. Until this Sunday’s call, he seemed laser focused on whatever was about to happen. In his words, his exist for the past two and a half months was “hour by hour” as directed by Drill Sergeants.
Now two weeks from his graduation, I felt a shift in him.
Yosef’s current situation at Fort Leonard Wood has, from my seat, started to be closer to a “normal” military life – one where discipline can coexist with friendship and camaraderie. A life that is purpose driven and ruled by a “we’re in this together” mentality. He seemed to relish the small privileges they’d provided – like sleeping in until 6:30 am, past their customary 4:30 daily alarm.
During our 15-minute chat, Yosef talked about chatting with Drill Sergeants and other soldiers-in-training as they rucked to an all night field exercise – about home, football, their families, about their MOS. Yosef spoke about cliches that had taken shape in the barracks of like-minded guys that would be doing their AIT stints together after Basic Training finished. All of his fellow trainees looked forward to the small freedoms that training outside of the 24/7 Basic Training cadence would provide. Yosef griped about a handful of fellow SIT’s that seem to want to “boss us young kids around” – a statement that made me laugh.
I talked to my son about being so close to completing something that so few are courageous enough to do. There is no way, I told him, that I would be able to complete Basic Training in the Army – no way. Sure, I’d find a way to muscle through to honor my commitment, but I’m damn sure that I would not have grown up in the way that Yosef has in the past two plus months.
Maybe I didn’t need Basic to mature.
Yosef did and he has succeeded. I feel like I supplied an immature teenager to the Army that they have cultivated into a mature young man.
Just as Yosef is allowing himself to now look forward to graduation, so am I. I’m not counting down the days, but I have become more anxious as his mid-December graduation date looms. I no longer write daily letters – they wouldn’t arrive in time. I don’t expect to reach any further mail from Yosef either. I think I’ll miss that old school communication.
The chat with my son wasn’t all roses. We’d recently decorated for Christmas and putting up his ornaments was a gut punch. Yosef’s siblings helped hang his pink tractor and homemade kindergarten ornaments as I reminded them to “do a good job because he’ll be back to see the tree for Christmas.” (Soldiers are given a holiday break from December 20th through January 2nd – though I’m unsure if this pertains to SITs in Basic Training during Christmas).
Despite a bit of holiday blues, this week’s call with Yosef was one of looking forward, one of excitement, and growth.
I cannot wait to hug my (not so) little boy in a few weeks.
More than that, though, I absolutely cannot wait to meet this new young man I’ve only spoken to on the phone – the one the Army has help create, the man I knew Yosef was capable of becoming.
